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104 Funny And Harmless Conspiracy Theories That Might Lighten Up The Mood

Ireland doesn't exist. Bay leaves do absolutely nothing for your food. Lint rollers leave your clothes slightly sticky on purpose so they pick up even more lint—meaning you'll keep buying refills forever and remain trapped in the lint industrial complex. Andlotteries? Obviously designed to catch time travelers who "coincidentally" nail the winning numbers.

Sounds silly, but that's the entire point of r/LowStakesConspiracies. It's asubredditwhere people sharehilarious, harmlesstheoriesjust for the fun of it—no alien cover-ups or government scandals required. We've collected the best ones from the community below. Check them out and upvote your favorites.

Existence is a scam made up by philosophers to sell more philosophy

Passport photos are deliberately made to look as bad as possible so you can be identified easily after a long haul flight.

Lint rollers are designed to leave a coating of adhesive on your clothes so more things stick to them therefore increasing lint roller use.

Elf on the shelf was created by the government to make the younger generations desensitized to being constantly watched.

Dads hate stopping on road trips because then all of the vehicles they worked hard to pass for the last hour get back ahead of them

Since the conductor can't play the bassoon or the piccolo or whatever, all the real musicians feel sorry for him. Everyone agrees to let him stand there harmlessly and wave his arms while they play competently which they can obviously do anyway. Meanwhile the conductor is playing a giant playstation never knowing the controller is not plugged in. It's really sweet that the musicians keep telling him what a great job he is doing at playing Tchaikovsky and not laughing while he flings his limbs around like Ron Weasley with a broken wand.

Stephen Hawking's time traveler party actually was attended, but to avoid any accidental paradoxes being created it was reported that nobody showed up.

Gender is a scam invented by bathroom companies to sell more bathrooms.

Jar companies tighten their jars slightly more than the average woman's grip strength, to maintain the patriarchy

So many Men Have foot [desires] because their first partner was a sock

T.S. Eliot uses the S. so that his name isn't toilet backwards.T. Eliot backwards is toilE .T

Passing away was invented by funeral companies to sell more coffins

There are aliens on Reddit using it to get a feel for what humans are like before invading

The TSA has figured out a long time ago how to detect liquid explosives in drink containers, we're not allowed to bring drinks into airports because the convenience stores in airports just want to be able to sell more overpriced drinks.

Geologists know about tastier rocks than salt, and are holding out on us. They are keeping the tastiest rocks for themselves

People have been instructed to say "on accident" just to bug me. And they know it should be "by accident"! But they "could care less", right?

We see it happen again and again, someone gets brain damage, they become conservative. What if Elon gave himself Neuralink, it obviously failed, and what we're left with is a dribbling moron. I mean, y'all saw that gif at the inauguration right? Where he's like, spinning in his own head? Something is severely wrong. Dude's brain is probably literally cooked.

Ireland does not exist - it was invented as part of a marketing campaign to sell Guinness

Hold music is annoyingly scratchy and repetitive on purpose so you will hang up and stop bothering them.

The government paid for or otherwise boosted this tweet in order to de-legitimize the anti-government message of Rage Against the Machine

At some point in the past, when Musk was an edgy teen or maybe an impressionable child, he wanted to change his name to X. He thought it would be SUPER COOL but his evil rich parents wouldn't let him. Over time it became the fixation we see today - a company called X, a child called X æ whatever, stupid x-shaped jumps, and all. He's a raging transphobe not for any political or moral reason, but because his daughter changing her name fills him with enraged jealousy.If we get enough people telling him the transes will let him change his name AND gender to X, maybe he'll switch sides.

I'm not normally one for conspiracy theories, but this is pretty compelling

Milkmen don't exist. It's all delivered by cats

Elon has body dismorphia/disphoria. This is evident in all his "hero" pics where he posts heavily edited pics of himself...Trump LITERALLY wears high heels, makeup, and a wig...Elon is NB, and Trump is transfem.They are lovers hiding in plain sight, by throwing other trans folks under the bus, so that the press ignores the truth.

I've been to 28 of his restaurants and I never saw him in the kitchen. Watching his shows on channel 4, when ever he is making anything they zoom on his hands like Thunderbirds in the 60s where a hand model does all the work. Ironically he's actually scared of kitchens as he thinks the pots and pans come to life like a 1930s Disney cartoon.

Supermarkets block your phone signal to prevent you comparing prices. I had no data in 90% of the supermarkets I have visited…

So, 23rd and 24th of September was supposed to be The Rapture, I'd imagine there are plenty of people disappointed to be waking up still on planet earth today.They'll say "oh, we got it wrong" and "I'll definitely be raptured when it comes for real".It was real, they're in denial. It's just that, of all the billions of people on this planet, not a single person was good enough to make the grade. Jesus checked the spreadsheet twice, there was a big red NOPE next to everyone.

I've flown at least 60 times in my life, and I've never had security take more than 45 minutes, even at some of the busiest airports on a holiday weekend. Most of the time, the line to the Starbucks is longer than the security line.

These 'crafts' sent home by my kid's nursery (preschool) are a way to make parents do the nursery's recycling.

Every recipe tells you to add this random leaf that has no smell or taste. You take it out before you eat the food. What is it doing? Nobody knows.That's because Big Bay Leaf is pouring massive amounts of money into getting online recipes to include it.

Nordic countries are spreading the British food memes to distract the world from how terrible Nordic food is

I'm not necessarily hating on it; language evolves, and we are (of course) in the middle of a vowel shortage. I reckon the next shift will be "bouro" for "bureaucratic" because who's got the time and vowels to spell that out every time.

Sonic the hedgehog was deliberately shown to be a lovecraftian horror in order to gain large amounts positive hype when they "changed" all the cgi scenes

Tinder is literally a project designed by the US military to break women down to the point where they just say f it and marry a random army dude after two weeks, so they never have to receive another "haha wyd" text

Their ideal customer keeps paying every month, watches a few things, and keeps scrolling through the front page hoping something interesting pops up.But there's nothing interesting, so Netflix has to fill the page with nonsense to hide the fact that there aren't that many good shows.If you could scroll through the entire catalog and realize that you've watched everything you care about, you'd unsubscribe.

"experts" tell you not to look at screens before bed bc it "messes up your circadian rhythm" but they're just lying so that they can enjoy unfettered high speed connections at bedtime. they want the night internet all to themselves

Unfortunately, due to an oversight in planning, the main ingredient in both the American Chip and British Chip is potato, so the whole scheme was an abject failure and has led to decades of confusion and miscommunication between the two nations.However, it has recently emerged that actors baked deep into the potato industry may have deliberately mashed up the plans to in order to increase potato sales.

Weetabix is made from recycled weetabix boxes

The sprite of Butterfree from Pokémon was accidentally switched with Venomoth's. Note Butterfree's similarities with Venonat; including red eyes, a round purple body, flat feet and small clawed hands.

Ghosts and monsters were made up by big energy to scare children into using the lights at night more.

In due course, her and the nfl guy she is engaged to will break up and she will use the publicity to advertise another album of break up songs that she has already written. Leading to another record breaking world tour that will see her earn another couple of billion dollars.

Fact: his recent baby mommas have revealed he uses surrogates to have his children, which requires IVF Fact: In IVF, you can have embryos screened and selected/discarded based on your preferences Fact: all his kids were assigned male at birthWhen one of them turned out to be a girl after all and transitioned, he couldn't handle it because he spent so much money and effort making sure he only had boys.

The Royal family still eat swans and the only reason it's illegal for anyone else to do so is because they're so delicious, they want them all for themselves

Alright so I've got a friend who is jewish and he never used to wear one, but I noticed he started losing some hair back there and he's suddenly started wearing one a lot more often. He claims he's just feeling closer to his religion but i don't buy it.I reckon whoever invented them was balding and needed to make an excuse as to why he was wearing a hat and it got out of hand.

Ozempic doesn't work, you just have $1,500 less per month to pay for food

Hospitals tell people that "they'll never walk again" even when it's not true just so people can have more engaging stories

Anakin Skywalker was supposed to be a young adult in The Phantom Menace, but during pre-production someone pointed out that he was so whiny and immature he sounded like a child. Recasting was easier than rewriting the whole movie.

The actions of the family are far too kind, no members of the aristocracy in the uk would be that kind and generous and hospitable to their below stairs staff.The writers are friends with the owners of Highclere (the main set for Downton) and hold their own titles.Its all to make us feel more sympathy for the billionaires amd bourgeoisie of the world.

The huge inflated seal levitating in the sky is called the Moon to distract you from the dangers of helium-filled balloons. Apollo was just a rescue mission to save the child still holding onto the ribbon.

Baby wipes and similar tissue products are deliberately designed to make you pull too many tissues out in one go, causing you to have to buy more. There's always one that seems wrapped around and causes me to pull about 10 out at once. They never go back in well and dry out.

Nobody has ever legitimately referred to pizza as "za". This is a myth invented by Scrabble enthusiasts to make the game more interesting

There's a forgotten 4th piece of cutlery that They have forced us to forget

Reddit was created by the CIA to identify the brightest minds but it failed and ended up a support group for sad virgins

In many countries, you can't buy a single guinea pig because they get "lonely". This is clearly a shill manœuvre by Big Guinea Pig to sell more guinea pigs.

…but because the uneven blocks cause you to lose track of how much you've eaten and encourage you to eat more. Don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of the business concept and a BIGGER fan of the chocolate, but by god I swear I get through a bar in like two sittings every time by accident!

New theory: all AI stuff is actually just a bunch of Indian people.

Car dependency

my dad sent me this

No such thing as a coincidence...

The recent Pedro Pascal hate has been orchestrated by anti trans groups because he is so popular and vocal about trans rights

I was typing out a thank you message and they responded with a "your welcome" message before I even sent it. Can they see our messages as we type them?

Lottery winners are investigated for being time travellers

Luigi Mangione is too good looking to be a normal guy, he's clearly a brainwashed male model made to [eliminate] the CEO guy

Is it possible that Bonnie blue is from another planet and she is here to collect human DNA to take back to her home planet

…it's not even multiple people. Those pieces just manifest, like black mold, in areas of social inequality as the universe balancing energies out. Similar to how the Mona Lisa isn't real and just showed up in 1939 to make people sigh.

Chinese ChatGPT 'Deep Seek' is actually one million people in a warehouse answering questions. China needs to be deemed to have won the AI race and this came from nowhere.

So, it's established that there's only a few regulars in the bar, and yet Moe doesn't ever question the name he gets given by a 10 year old, he just shouts it out, coincidentally in a way that makes sense both in the phone term, but also the rude joke.Then there's the fact that, the one time Bart is complimentary, Moe actually thanks him by name. Which makes me think Moe knew it was Bart all along, and was just playing to entertain the kid.

r/birdsarentreal and r/giraffesdontexist are both just decoys created by the government to take our attention away from other animal-shaped surveillance drones.

Mickey mouse became public domain recently, in order to protect Disney's trademarks and as much intellectual property rights as possible they are going back through their back catalogue and creating new live action versions so that they can at least protect the trademarks for when they become public domain characters.That's why the live action remakes are always dog shit that make no money. The mouse cares not for profit, it's all about the intellectual property

The Sims games have a weirdly consistent recurring behavior, in that Sims taking care of their own needs will do so in humorously ineffective and short-lived ways, and if you've been crippled by depression before then you'll find their behavior oddly familiar.Sims taking care of their own need to sleep will very often refuse to sleep, instead making cups of coffee to sustain themselves. If you don't command them to use a bed, they'll just crash right on the floor.Their need to eat is sated most often by foods that take very little preparation, effort, or ingredients. A Sim would rather eat a bag of potato chips than cook a meal, and if they do cook, it's something like salad or grilled cheese.Taking care of their clothing and their cleanliness? Uncommon. Sims won't often feel any urge to shower or change their clothes even if it's actively making them uncomfortable.When they need entertainment, Sims will often turn to unproductive and simple means, like a TV or a computer.The only thing they seem good at doing is using the bathroom, but even then, it's not rare for a Sim to put their toilet priority so low that they'll up and pee themselves.

Do I Need To Say More?

Asda White Rectangle Conspiracy

Pokémon don't poo or pee because their waste byproduct is expelled through use of their special moves.

People who say "Sexuality is a choice" are actually just bisexual and just don't realise it

Dwayne The Rock Johnson has been on steroids/ what ever PEDs for yeeaaaars. He made a whole brand being an enormous muscle monster. That many years on chemicals will kill you, he knows this. So now he's dropped a bunch of weight. Still in shape, but not up to his literal ears in muscle, to play a role as an MMA fighter. (MMA fighters are much slimmer even tho a lot use steroids.) This slim down is the perfect excuse to cycle off the steroids without ever breaking kayfabe. My prediction he'll never be huge again.

The "kills 99% of germs" products were designed by mad germ scientists to cull the herd and ensure that only the strongest genes are passed on

The whole "Obama's last name" thing is a misdirect to get people to forget that his first name is "Thanks". Thanks Obama.

Stephen Hawking was diagnosed with ALS in his 20s and lived over 50 years with it, when typically people with ALS live another 2-5 years which is unheard of.My low stakes conspiracy theory is that soon after Hawking discovered his ALS he began frantically researching a cure or at least treatment, and he successfully found a way to significantly reduce the progression of ALS, but that either the method he used to discover the cure or the method of producing the cure itself involved breaking some ethical (or perhaps legal) barrier, so he kept it quiet.That would explain why a very smart scientist lives for 50 years with ALS while most other people live 2-5 years.For the record I don't necessarily think this is actually true, but it's fun to speculate and seems weirdly plausible.

r/showerthoughts was created to promote showering

I imagine a lot of people waste time on their phones on the toilet during the workday. This probably amounts to 1000s of hours of lost productivity.So why wouldn't a workplace do this when designing the office?Well, that's what I believe has happened. Right outside our toilet cubicles I get full 5G signal and fast internet. As soon as that door closes, nothing. Not a single bar of signal.The walls are the same thickness as outside the cubicles and the only difference in a fairly thin (seemingly) wooden door.There are two blocks of toilet cubicles, the exact same thing happens in both.

Every time I try a meal subscription, the first couple of boxes are incredible - fresh produce, generous portions, recipes that feel premium.Then, like clockwork, it slides. Wilted veggies, smaller protein cuts and suddenly every dish is just a taco or salad.My theory: new customers get the premium stock to hook you. Once you've settled in, they downgrade you to a bulk-tier supply chain.Basically, the first few meals are the champagne service, then you're on tap water for life.

If you were alive in the 90s, especially as a kid, you remember that every electronic device had a version with transparent plastic. They were always the coolest version of the device, and I personally always wanted the transparent one. Nintendo especially put out a lot of transparent electronics. I had a transparent Gameboy Color, a transparent GameCube controller, and some of the Pokemon games were transparent. I remember the bubble iMacs where you could see everything inside of it.But alas, the clear craze started to die out. In fact, it almost went away overnight. What happened? If you ask Google, apparently the transparent plastic is more expensive to produce, and isn't as sturdy. But looking at the transparent Gameboy that I have, I don't know if "less sturdy" is entirely accurate. But what I really think happened is that we started to associate weight with quality, and companies started to get cheap with it.Back in the 90s, and even today, you could tell that a product was going to be good by simply picking it up off the shelf. If it weighed nothing, then it was clearly lower quality than the one that was heavier. Because the heavier one had more something in it. Some sort of bits and bobs that clearly helped it work. Whether this was true or not didn't matter. If it came down to it, you would pick the heavier one. Companies, being companies, caught on to this trend. Companies, also being companies, decided to be really cheap and cheat the system. They started to hide cheap weights in their product. Mostly steel plates to give it that extra heft that people wanted, while only costing the manufacturer a few cents.But in order to hide this from the consumer, they couldn't use transparent plastic. After all, if you saw a company clearly being cheap, then you probably wouldn't buy their product in the future. You can still find some lower end electronics with steel plates in them today. But either way, companies cheaping out and making products artificially heavier led to the death of transparent electronics. Luckily it seems like they're slowly coming back, which I'm all for!

Tesco deliberately have bad reception in their stores so you can't load your club card in the app and have to pay full price at the till

Mathematics is plural. There are many different branches of Mathematics. Most countries recognise this by abbreviating Mathematics as "Maths".The USA needs people to be ground under the machine for the wealthy. Mathematics is the universal language. As such undermining Mathematics gives strength to the rich.So call it "Math" because it sounds smaller and, let's face it, sounds silly.Ergo everyone hates Math and everyone is more stupid as a result.

To my experience and to experience of everyone I know, beating the shit out of someone bullying you helps. In the rare case it didn't helped, it was because teachers took bullys side.Yet we are always told we should just ignore it and inform a teacher/adult. Which is reasonable to be a first step if that happends. But sometimes it doesn't help, or the adult does nothing.And in that case we are still suppossed to sit it off, not create any fuss. You can ignore someone getting bullied, but it is hard to ignore fight with blood spilling.I heard that kids who are bullied often have shy/defetist etc. parents as well. So sorta folks that are unlikely to start fuss, even the parents. And vice versa, bullies have aggressive/enthusiastic parents. Aka the type to storm the school asking why theirs angel have broken jaw. Even if they are good people, they can cause "problems" for the teachers. If I learned that the reason my kid have broken jaw is because they bullied someone and that person kicked them in the head, I would be just as furious. Not at the person, but at the school for letting it go that far (without at least telling me).

r/PeterExplainsTheJoke is a project by AI companies to train their models to understand humor and sarcasm

Chuck E Cheese was created by Casinos to get children addicted to gambling early in life.

I don't necessarily have "evidence", but in season 1 ep 14, Spongebob gets caught trying to do Karate at work, and mr krabs tells him "no more". The theory doesn't really click until sponegbob and sandy get to the park later in the episode, where they make their best attempts to restrain themselves from doing karate moves on each other during a picnic.There are also several points throughout the show where spongebob and sandy do Karate with each other publicly and it seems to make the other bikini bottom residents uncomfortable. They are (that I can remember) the only two characters who do it in the show, besides that one episode where they visit karate island.

My theory is that Claudia Winkleman, British TV presenter, is an act for the camera and the woman who plays her looks totally different off camera.My main pieces of evidence: 1. That hair is obviously a wig 2. Her make-up gets more horrible every time I see her, it's like a badly done mask.I think she does this so that off camera she goes without makeup and wig and lives a normal, private, life.

Facebook created the "memories" feature so that you delete your own cringy [stuff] from the past to free up space on their servers

Personalized children's cloths / toys with names on them are an effort by corporations to reduse "hand-me-downs" so you buy more.

The idea that British people have bad teeth was created by the American medical and insurance industries to make us skeptical or socialized healthcare.

The Dr Pepper people make a big song and dance about their drink having this mysterious mixed fruits flavour, but as soon as you take a sip while thinking about almonds it's obviously just almond flavoured. If you use it as a mixer with amaretto you get a drink that tastes exactly like Dr Pepper with alcohol mixed in, because the amaretto and the Dr Pepper have the same flavour. The problem is that if you're marketing an almond-flavoured drink you have two options: accept that people with nut allergies aren't going to buy it, or make it very clear that there's no actual nuts in the recipe and risk losing customers who care about natural flavourings. For the Dr Pepper people to maximise sales, the safest option is to keep the flavour secret and rely on the faint air of mystery to draw people in.

The plandemic was created by the tourism industry as it was the only way to get clear day time photographs of famous landmarks

Those vibrations you are imagining? They're real. There's just an algorithm that works out if you haven't looked at your phone enough.

Apparently you can see the things from 38km (24mi) away. They would be a pretty handy reference point if I was lost and didn't have my phone on me. Might explain why there are a bunch of them - so you can estimate how far way you as well as your heading.I wouldn't be surprised if the Pharos thought, 'These idiots keep getting lost in the desert - let's build them a marker.'

I believe that Digiorno is shorting us EXACTLY 2 PEPPERONI every time. But why..

The idea that creased clothes are unsightly or make you look worse was spread by the inventor of the iron to sell everyone an iron.

Mimas (Saturn's moon) is actually the Death Star, everything Star Wars told you was wrong

Okay so basically if you're not from the UK we have a thing in all supermarkets called a 'meal deal', which is where you buy a main, a snack and a drink. This normally comes out to about £3.50 (daylight robbery). Snacks are normally floating around the £1 mark and drinks are also around £1.25. You'd think, then, that sandwiches would be maybe £2-£2.50 in order to make the deal worth it. They're not. A basic sandwich is close to £3 now, and that's for just a plain ham and bread. You can get sandwiches now that are £5, which is absolutely insane. This makes the meal deal an incredible bargain. Why would you buy a sandwich by itself for £5 when you could get crisps AND a drink for £1.50 less?? I think that these sandwiches are priced so high specifically to make the meal deal look like a better choice. They're never meant to be bought by themselves. The choice of buying a sandwich at a UK supermarket is an illusion. There is no solo sandwich.

Taylor Swift signed her Kamala endorsement with "Childless Cat Lady" so that if you google "Taylor Swift Cats" her role in the Cats (2019) film would no longer be the top result.

Dry Jan was made up to give people something to talk about after the Christmas break.

Flossing is actually bad for your teeth and gums. No-one has ever found out because no-one does it.

The six dwarves all have beards and ears of equal proportion. They're also all built kind of stocky. With the exception of Dopey. Dopey is slim with large ears and no beard. His "dopey" attitude is actually just a jovial one that the hard working dwarves misconstrued as stupidity. Dopey fits a more traditional halfing/hobbit than he does a dwarf. None of the dwarves have told him, they'd rather he felt silly than alone.

byAdministrator

in

February 05, 2026

104 Funny And Harmless Conspiracy Theories That Might Lighten Up The Mood

Ireland doesn't exist. Bay leaves do absolutely nothing for your food. Lint rollers leave your clothes slightly stic...

AB JRNL

byAdministrator

in

February 05, 2026

104 Funny And Harmless Conspiracy Theories That Might Lighten Up The Mood

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